We’re six months in and this is what I’ve learned:
The kitchen needs always to be stocked with Grippos, beer cheese, frozen pizzas, and Ritz crackers.
Sharing a bank account is not easy, but so necessary.
Every weekend cannot be jammed packed with things to do.
Submission is a beautiful, intimate gift from God.
There is never an end to “sports season” because your husband loves every sport ever played and has an incurable disease of needing to watch every. single. game.
The pressure you feel to always have a clean house, make a home-cooked meals five nights a week, have the laundry done, check the mail and pay the bills, and smile when he gets home doesn’t come from your husband, but in fact comes from you.
Choosing which families to visit when you’re in town is hard.
Sharing a bed is not all butterflies and roses, especially when you’ve indulged in Fourth Meal and it doesn’t sit well with your tummy.
Yellow sticky notes are essential to a healthy marriage. And they should always be put on the bathroom mirror.
Sometimes the only compliment or word of encouragement your spouse needs is from your mouth.
Girls need their time with girls. And guys need their time with guys.
Your husband may try very hard, do everything he can think of to help, but sometimes when you’re sick… you just need your momma.
Baby brothers still get defensive over you even when you’re married. And especially when your husband is poking the fun.
Staying up past your normal bedtime usually causes fits of laughter and intimate conversations, so stay up late.
If you have something negative to say, imagine him saying it to you.
Your tone of voice is the spark of the fire. It’s not what you say, but how you say it.
Men need hugs, and pats on the back, and to be held, just as much as women.
Binge watching Netflix is a way to bond, even if the only words you exchange are: “Another episode?”
Even though you live together, eat together, ride in the car together, and sleep together, you still need time together.
Again, if you have something negative to say, make sure it’s not about your husband, and it’s not in front of your mother, his mother, your friends, or anyone else for that matter.
You are his protector, just as much as he is yours.
When you want something to happen, TELL HIM. Don’t let him fall flat on his face because of your unreasonably high expectations.
Buying yourself flowers can feel just as good as if he bought them.
Marriage brings out sin, and sometimes it hurts really bad.
Some days you wonder who this person is, and that’s okay.
The good days and the bad days are both incredibly valuable and sweet.
Holding hands is the greatest comfort.
Even if he claims to not like surprises, surprise him anyway.
Take turns choosing music on road trips, and stand firm when he pouts through your Miley Cyrus concert.
Put your phone down. Posting that you love your hubby for everyone else to see means nothing. What you do that isn’t posted is what means everything.
Most importantly, I’ve learned that marriage is not about “me”. Marriage is about “we”. Marriage is about him, and me, and Him. Without God’s grace, without Christ’s example, without His forgiveness, our marriage wouldn’t be possible.
These six months haven’t been easy, they haven’t been perfect. We’ve learned a lot through a lot of mistakes. But these six months… they’ve been ours.
All photos by the one and only Katherine Jury.