Once upon a time, I met a boy when I was in the 8th grade. He was cute, funny, charming, and worst of all for my teenage heart (and my parents) – a bad boy. He had that kind of personality that was totally infectious and made all the girls giggle to one another. He never let you get too close, but just enough to keep you interested. Truly a down to the bone bad boy.
Fast forward nine years and that total bad boy is my husband.
Now, the last nine years obviously haven’t been as easy as typing “fast forward”, but they have been interesting. Many of you know our story – a story of heartbreak and confusion, and complete reliance on the Lord. One day maybe I’ll share the full story here, but for now let’s meet for coffee.
Yet, on November 7th, 2015, I married the bad boy that captured my heart so many years ago. I still get giddy when he calls. My throat still swells when we catch each other’s eye. And when he reaches for my hand, I flat out lose it in my mind.
Now I’m not writing all of this to portray some perfect image of Spencer and me. Marriage is anything but perfect because it’s real life. And Spencer is a sinner, and I am a sinner, so obviously things get a little twisted some times. We like to refer to ourselves as the Happy Hahns (shameless hashtag plug), but really that’s to remind us that we get to CHOOSE to be the Happy Hahns. So when one of us is pouting (usually me) or the other is hangry (usually him), we look at each other and say, “Are you being a Happy Hahn right now?” Immediately we see our selfishness and try again.
I am writing this, however, because our story is messy and long and exhausting, but oh so full of grace. God’s grace. He took us on a journey, and still is, that neither one of us had planned. We lived 10 hours apart for four years, dated other people, dreamed different dreams. We were literally on two separate paths in our lives, and during that time, He molded and developed and nurtured us into the people He created us to be. And in HIS time, not ours, the Lord brought us together to join on the same path. As man and wife.
If I’ve learned anything this last year, it’s that God knows exactly what He is doing. He has every single thing planned in our lives to work out for our good. Before this last year, I think I believed that, but I didn’t truly understand. Now I get it. Looking back, I see His faithfulness throughout every stage of my life the last nine years. He crafted such a beautiful, hard story that only He could create for His glory.
So come back to speed with me. It’s December 24th, Christmas Eve. My life looks so different than it did a year ago. Does yours? Sometimes it feels like nothing has changed, until you take time to look back and realize that – wow – a lot has changed. This time next year, it will be the same story. But for me, I want to be more aware of God’s faithfulness. I want to trust Him in the NOW, not just by looking to the past. Instead of questioning our finances or career decisions or baby plans (don’t freak), I want to give those huge parts of life to God and KNOW that He will provide. In His time.
Just like He has every single year.
I mean, he turned a bad boy into a preacher. He can’t get more faithful than that 😉
Back to November 7th, 2015. Last night we came home from Spencer’s parents’ to find the sweetest package in the mail. I’ve been patiently (right, Katie?!) waiting for this package to arrive, and it did the night before Christmas Eve. OUR WEDDING PHOTOS WERE IN MY HANDS. I yelled in a much louder voice than I anticipated, “It’s a Christmas miracle!”
We snuggled up on our tiny yellow couch by the Christmas tree and relived the most amazing day of our lives. The moment was as magical as it sounds. And because I’m literally obsessed, as in I haven’t stopped looking at all 705 photos in 24 hours, here are a few of our favorites.
*All photos taken by Katherine Jury. If she isn’t your wedding photographer, you’re wrong. And if you’re already married, you should put that beautiful white gown on again and hire this girl to retake some pictures. She’s phenomenal.